Chapter 36

Yuan Zhong gently stroked her cheek, his fingertips touching her damp tears. He tried to wipe them away with his fingers but couldn’t dry them.

“Why are you crying?” he asked softly.

Tanyin shook her head, “I… I’m just a bit emotional.”

Yuan Zhong was filled with countless emotions—pride, joy, and a bit of fear. He felt as if everything before him was just a dream that might disappear in the next moment.

He lowered his head to kiss her eyes repeatedly, murmuring like a plea, “Call me, say my name.”

“Yuan Zhong.”

“Say it again.”

“Yuan Zhong.”

His joy reached its peak, and he wrapped his arms around her waist, lifting her up again. Seeing her wet eyelashes and eyes, he suddenly felt that he could abandon everything, even his life, for this moment.

“Is this real?” He couldn’t help but ask, unsure if he was questioning her or himself.

Tanyin gently caressed his brows and eyes with her hand. At this moment, he was as happy as a child. The naive young man from the high platform had never really grown up; his clear eyes were like the pristine snow atop a mountain.

In truth, the corrupt person was her; her tribulations were her own fault.

“Am I heavy?” she chuckled.

Last time, he had said the goddess was quite heavy.

Yuan Zhong’s eyes sparkled with a dazzling smile, brighter than the sun.

“So heavy, my arms are about to break.” He laughed, showing his white teeth, deliberately complaining.

Tan Yin flicked his forehead, “Then why don’t you let go?”

He jostled her slightly, holding her securely, and sighed, “Even if I held you for a thousand years, I wouldn’t want to let go.”

Tanyin remained silent as the wind grew stronger. She used her fingers to tidy his hair, which had been blown away, tucking it behind his ear. Suddenly, she noticed a scroll of paintings tied with red silk at his feet, lying in the snow and getting wet.

“Your painting to ward off evil spirits can’t be used anymore,” she laughed.

Yuan Zhong proudly raised his chin, “I have a real goddess; what do I need a painting for?”

Yes, his goddess, his divine being.

How many times had he held this cold figure in his dreams, only to wake up to emptiness. He had never told anyone about this special feeling, knowing he would laugh at himself if he did.

While all his clan members bowed to her in reverence, he had the audacity to want to stand beside her. His feelings made him believe they were equals.

This was such a ridiculous and arrogant pride, but even now, he maintained this pride. She was a goddess; whatever she was, they were equals.

At this moment, his goddess was real in his arms, her long hair softly enveloping him. Yuan Zhong looked at her intently. Her eyes, like black gems, were avoiding, retreating, wandering, and hesitating to meet his gaze.

“Look at me…” he whispered.

“Tanyin, look at me… don’t leave.”

Finally, her eyes hesitated and met his.

She liked him, though she didn’t say it, but her eyes spoke volumes.

Yuan Zhong held the back of her head, lifted his head, and gently kissed her beautiful chin. His trembling lips moved upward, devouring her bit by bit, finally landing on her lips again.

His lips stopped trembling, and he kissed gently, gradually becoming intense. His hands unconsciously pressed her lower, making their sealed lips even tighter.

Tanyin gradually felt a suffocating pain. Unconsciously, she parted her lips slightly to breathe under his intense kisses. But suddenly, his tongue invaded her mouth, and her mind exploded, like something had burst inside her, making her let out a short, involuntary moan.

This kiss was entirely different from before. No longer clumsy and timid, it was intense, even fierce, full of aggression.

Tanyin felt like snow melting under the sun, slowly turning into water. Her heartbeat was controlled by him, and it seemed he was controlling her entirely. This feeling was both new and terrifying. She wanted to escape but was reluctant. Her heartbeat grew faster and louder. She could only feel him invading her entire world, leaving imprints, breaths, and scents—everything.

The long, deep kiss lasted a very long time until Yuan Zhong slowly left her wet, reddened lips and kissed her nose and cheeks. She still hadn’t recovered, her mind foggy.

Yuan Zhong buried his head in her chest, breathing heavily; his voice muffled, “I… I’m dying.”

Tanyin finally regained some sense and mumbled, “What…?”

He stayed buried in her chest, unwilling to lift his head, speaking in a very low voice, “Don’t look at me.”

Only then did she realize even his ears were red, like translucent agate in the sunlight. Tanyin’s foggy mind suddenly cleared, and all her senses returned. She couldn’t help but laugh, gently touching his ears. Even through her gloves, they felt burning hot. After a while, his ears returned to their original color.

Yuan Zhong looked up at her and suddenly smiled, “I’m going to make incense. Will you come?”

Tanyin smiled too, “Sure.”

He put her down, holding her hand as they walked into the small building together.

Little Erji was still running around tirelessly. More and more small wooden figures lay fallen at its feet, and the painting on the snow was soaked through. Hiding in a distant shadow, little Yuan Zhong bit a handkerchief and nodded vigorously with a satisfied expression: “Big Zhong! You finally did something brave! Well done!”

He turned and ran towards the kitchen. He wanted to make a delicious meal to celebrate!

Last time, he had cut the meat of an old turtle and cruelly slaughtered two celestial cranes, only to be scolded by Yuan Zhong, making him never dare to do such things again. Meat was out of the question, and the fish in the lake were probably some sort of spirit beings too; better not touch them.

Little Yuan Zhong pulled out a few large white radishes, washed them clean, and was peeling them when he suddenly saw Tanyin slowly walking out of the small building. Strange, didn’t she just go in? Did Big Zhong finish so quickly?! Disgraceful! No wonder the master looked so pitiful! Wait, is she crying?!

He quickly threw down the radish and ran over, shouting, “Master, what’s wrong with you?”

Something wasn’t right! Master looked very wrong! He was shouting so loudly, but she didn’t seem to hear—no, it was more than not hearing; she looked completely lost, like her soul wasn’t in her body.

Little Yuan Zhong suddenly stopped in his tracks, suspiciously looking towards the small building. The door was open, but he couldn’t see Big Zhong’s figure. Turning back, Tanyin was standing by the lake, her head lowered, lost in thought.

“Master…”

He slowly walked over. This time, Tanyin finally noticed, turning to smile at him, “You found me.”

Little Yuan Zhong sensed something was off and anxiously said, “Master, what’s wrong? Did Big Zhong… do something to you?”

Tanyin smiled faintly, “He’s asleep. I used some divine power, and he won’t wake up until tomorrow. If he weren’t asleep, I wouldn’t be able to leave.”

Little Yuan Zhong was truly shocked.

“Leave?! What do you mean by that?!”

Tanyin didn’t reply.

She lowered her head, looking at her hands covered in white gloves, staring at them for a long time.

“I’m going to find a place to seal my body, then I’ll return in a mortal body.”

She gave Little Yuan Zhong a reassuring smile.

“I’ll be back soon.”

Little Yuan Zhong suddenly shook his head.

“You’re lying. I can tell from the way you look. You’re not coming back.”

Tanyin fell silent.

He looked at her with rare disdain.

“You can’t even lie properly. Even I, a mechanical man, can see through you.”

Tanyin had no words to say, only managing an embarrassed, bitter smile.

“If you leave, Yuan Zhong will go mad,” Little Yuan Zhong said seriously for once.

“I don’t want to see him like that every day. Besides, why do you have to leave? Is he not good to you? Or is it because you’re a high and mighty goddess, and you think he doesn’t deserve you, so you want to end the pain quickly…?”

Tanyin interrupted him helplessly, “Little Yuan Zhong, you know so much… but it’s not what you think…”

“Even though I’m a mechanical man, don’t underestimate me!” Little Yuan Zhong huffed.

“If it’s not what I think, then what is it?”

He stared at Tanyin, hoping to see guilt or sadness in her expression, but there was none. She simply gazed into the distant unknown, and then several tears rolled down her cheeks.

She quickly wiped them away.

Little Yuan Zhong panicked.

Despite his cleverness, he was still just a mechanical man.

He didn’t understand human emotions.

Seeing Tanyin cry, all the prepared arguments he had flew out of his mind.

He stood there helplessly, fumbling through his clothes but unable to find anything to wipe her tears with.

“…What’s really going on?” He mumbled, genuinely at a loss.

Tanyin didn’t understand either.

Everything had seemed simple.

She had descended to the mortal world for Taihe’s left hand, intending to accompany this left hand until Yuan Zhong naturally died.

Why was there blood?

Why were there tears?

She had thought she had experienced everything with Taihe, her secret admiration followed by heartache and avoidance, but those past pains paled compared to what she felt now.

She felt guilt, regret… all sorts of negative emotions, yet she still returned to Yuan Zhong’s side.

If they could be together for a lifetime without telling him the truth, he would be happy, and so would she.

That would be wonderful.

But she felt like a malicious thief, deceitfully lying to him and to herself.

When she realized she couldn’t leave him, her tribulation began.

This was her retribution.

She could do as she told Little Yuan Zhong, sealing her body in the divine crystal and finding a suitable mortal body, continuing to deceive herself into happiness.

But Han Nu’s experience taught her that when the tribulation comes, sealing the body in the divine crystal is useless. Her self-deception would only hasten her downfall.

The best course of action was to leave, abandon Taihe’s left hand, and return to the divine realm to protect herself.

In the cold Wushuang Palace, she would continue her work with all her heart and soul for a thousand years, two thousand years, until she could forget. Perhaps she could safely survive the tribulation.

But what about Yuan Zhong?

How would he wait for her?

Until the end of his immortal life?

Or until Han Nu killed him, leaving him to despair when he learned the truth?

She couldn’t forget the high platform in his dreams, where the young boy held her hand, both determined and sad.

He said, “You like me, but you don’t want to say it.”

And when he leaned against her shoulder, covered in blood, proud yet timid, brushing her hair and asking, “Silly girl, do you like me?”

—Yes, yes, I like you, Yuan Zhong. I like you. Without realizing it, I have fallen in love with you.

Tanyin held onto a willow tree, slowly crouching down, crying so hard she couldn’t stand up.

She finally understood the soul-burning pain—that was her tribulation, devouring her body.

Desperately, she tore off her gloves and watched as her entire right hand slowly turned into translucent light particles.

She couldn’t stop it. She could only watch in despair.